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Thread: Across the Country

  1. #1
    Member run4it's Avatar
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    Across the Country

    So I spent last week driving my mother across the country to Arizona. A few things I noticed along the way:

    1) If you think living next to an ethanol plant would smell bad, try living in Tulsa!

    2) In Missouri, there are signs literally 20 yard apart, 1 reading "Pornography Destroys Lives", right next to the neon "ADULT STORE" sign. Yep...nothing works better than forced repression in the bible belt!

    3) We do NOT have the worst gas prices in the country. I paid $3 a gallon twice!

    4) I left Buffalo when it was sunny and 50. I got to Az and it was 30 in a blizzard. THAT'S EFFED UP, MAN!!!

    5) The water in Arizona has so much mineral in it that you get out of the shower feeling like you have a thin scum of limestone on you. The chlorine in the pool makes you feel cleaner than the showerhead.

    6) If the Travellodge in Elk City, OK were a video game, it would be called REDNECK RAMPAGE!!!

    7) Buffalo really does have some of the best food in the country

    8) Only 1 of my exes lives in Texas, but I'd hang my hat in Tennesse, or anywhere else in the world other than that poophole of a state

    9) I'd rather be a 'pasty white northerner' than a 'leather skinned cowboy', a la Jack Palance

    10) There's a whole lot of freakin nothing out there! Hell, the middle of the country makes Batavia look like a happenin' place!
    But your being a dick
    ~Wnyresident

  2. #2
    Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    3,075
    You reminded me of something when I lived in Maryland the water was *so* thick with sulfur every time I cleaned the dishes or used water it smelled like rotten eggs somethin' fierce!!

    Regards

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