are "bad" kids raised by bad parents?

[CAugust]

I am curious to opinions here ... we all realize that if a parent is a jerk - pays no attention to their child - or abuses them that the chances of them turning out not so great is pretty good ...

but are all "bad" kids raised by bad parenting?

what are your thoughts on this? curious

here are mine, I think you can get what my feelings are .....

I was at a conservatives friends home over the summer, she said to me, well my parents always say, if the kid is bad, all you need to do is look at the parents, its always their fault - my response to her?

"Please don't ever say that in public, you will look and sound like a moron"

now what's your take?

[anyones neighbor]

"Please don't ever say that in public, you will look and sound like a moron"
now what's your take?
LOL Colleen! I've seen lots of kids from wonderful homes with wonderful parents that are really brats. At the same time I'm seen kids from home of the Poor and rejected that are the best kids you'd ever want. So what's the answer?
Do the best you can with what you've got, teach them how to say PLEASE and THANK YOU instead of F*** you, and always remember that these kids DO listen to what you say. What I mean by that is if you use the F word, etc. they will too, nine times out of ten! My son-in-law uses the word like it was HIS! His daughter (my beautiful granddaughter) uses it the same way. I HATE it. My late daughter didn't like it either.:(

[mikenold]

I have to say that a parent should set a good example and do their best to give their children an opportunity to succeed. I too have seen bad children from good homes and good children from bad homes. I don't believe that the parent can be blamed for the child, good or bad. Everyone has to make their own way in this world and have no one to blame but themselves for the way they turn out in almost every single case. :)

[DomesticatedFeminist]

Such a great question.. with an answer of both yes and no..

Most but not all serial killers were abused or negligected as children.

There is a sociopath gene though, I was just listening to something about this on npr about a month ago or so. The dr who was testing all these prisoners found the most cold blooded had a particular gene and then did a genetic test on himself and found he had the same gene. He concluded in many cases it's nurture not nature. But then another doctor pointed out that nurture might not just be parenting, it could be anything from being bullied or seeing something on TV.

So it's like a combination of nature and nurture.

[mesue]

The age old controversy nature vs nurture.
A bad child isn't necessarily the product of a bad home. Sometimes, yes. Most times no.
There are kids out there that no matter how good of a home they come from they wind up in trouble. There are kids out there that you would never know that their home life sucks.
My son told me we had the Meatloaf family ...
Two out of three ain't bad :p
I think they're all okay just they way they are :)

[Achbek1]

Kids from bad families can hopefully see good role models in the community, etc. who can prove to those kids that their parents' idiocy is not the only way.

[shortstuff]

Bad parents do not inherently produce bad children that lead to grown up sociopaths. Good parents do not inherently produce bad children that lead to grown up sociopaths.

It is some mutation in the genes that is fed by the "nurture vs nature" development. Not conclusively however does this preclude the outcome. We all are genetically predisposed for one thing or another. Whether it is alcoholism , drug addiction, abusive nature , sociopath, pathological liar, addictive nature, etc~~however we have the thinking process that helps us to decide and make the right choices and decisions based on the norm's of society.

Faith helps us to make decisions and determine differences between right and wrong. Consequences helps up to learn from mistakes and stay the course.

[Linda_D]

Some "bad" kids are the result of physiological causes like genetic predisposition, mental illness or even FAS (fetal alcohol syndrome). Abuse and neglect are really good ways to make your kid much more likely to end up on the Eye Witless News police blotter.

In between those, there's a lot of gray area. Certainly parents who never think to say "no" to their children run the risk of raising children who get in trouble because they don't think rules apply to them but then parents who are too strict may raise rebels who just break all rules just because they can -- until they get locked up.

I think it's important for parents to set good examples. Preaching about honesty isn't worth a fraction of actually being honest. Preaching kindness doesn't teach a child to be kind if a parent doesn't practice kindness.